Rat with Uncle Sam hat

You dirty rat!

Come out and take it you, dirty yella-bellied rat. Leading man from the 1930s Jimmy Cagney – who sent money home to his mom his whole working career – sets the tone in the vintage clip from “Taxi“below:

Wouldn’t it be great if corrosive influences from “Demo” rats and “rino” rats – ring a ding John McCain – could be routed as easily? What would happen to such rats we discovered in the closet and dealt with despite the gasping, doe-eyed objection of those who treat the term “woman” like it’s a dirty word while using gender like a weapon?

Nobody is advocating violence, just acknowledging simpler times and the expectation that folks own up to dirty deeds. And if rats can do it, well, check out the hilarious up-close of the private life of the tailed and infamous in the viral video below that seems impossible to believe:

And if you believe that this is just a one-off – rats don’t need baths – better rethink your position. Pet owners face down the dilemma of accommodating their precious little rodent’s powder room needs on a daily basis.

“When giving your pet rat a bath, simply throwing them into the bathtub or dumping water on them isn’t going to work out,” Pet Helpful admonishes. Rats are naturally averse to water, hence the “rats leaving a sinking ship” stereotype.

Bath time can be fun. No, really.

Bath time can be fun. No, really.

Maybe that’s why so many in D.C. are crying foul about draining the swamp – the floaties make it easier not to drown – and they don’t want to leave the helm.

But rats, like all animals, are unique in their own way despite similar traits. Some will end up enjoying the bathing experience.

And while rats are commonly classified as clean – they “bathe” themselves often and groom each other in groups, just as politicians who cover for one another by rote – sometimes the family pet doesn’t accommodate the tastes of its owners (or the people). Aging pets also rest more and single dwellers don’t have the help of their whiskered friends.

The following tips can help prep for giving your pet that added hygiene boost. Thank you, Pet Helpful:

  1. Fill a small container with warm water and put it on the counter or in the bathtub
  2. Slowly cup some water and trickle it onto your rat’s fur and rub it in
  3. Wipe your rat down with a towel until it is completely dry

The same tips can be used with any water adverse animal – here, kitty, kitty. (Yes, cats can be bathed, too.) Accustoming the animal to water before the actual bath is key. But never, ever, “submerge your rat’s head under water; a rat’s immune system is rather sensitive, and they are prone to respiratory infections.” That’s true for both pets and politicians.

So, when the whiskered member of the family is acclimated to water, it’s bath time. Shampoo can also be used, just be sure to keep it off the head and ears and to rinse thoroughly and dry your little beastie with a fluffy towel – even if they wriggle vigorously against what will, in truth, keep them from dying out.

And voila – no more dirty rat!

King Abdulla of Jordan

King Abdullah of Jordan

What you talkin ’bout, King Abdullah?

Out of the mouths of babes, in this case, Gary Coleman of “Diff’rent Strokes” (RIP), who put a cute face on double-takes – that is, challenging the obviously absurd and begging an explanation of that which doesn’t pass the smell test.

Check out the video clip below:

King Abdulla of Jordan, however, apparently thinks he’s pulling a fast one, or maybe he believes himself when he attempts to put the sanguine spin on Islam, the religion of peace. But His Highness has this to say according to Jihad Watch: “The foundations of Islam are the same moral virtues seen in other religions like Christianity and Judaism. It is not a religion of hate. We as Muslims believe in Jesus Christ as the Messiah. We believe in the Bible and the Torah, and I think this is the way that all of us were brought up.”

Sounds good; but in reality Islam doesn’t view Christ as the Messiah but as merely a prophet. Big difference. So too are the Quranic verses that call for the subjugation of those who do not adhere to Muhammad’s view of end times – or any times, for that matter:

47:4: When you meet the unbelievers, strike their necks, then, when you have made wide slaughter among them, tie fast the bonds; then set them free, either by grace or ransom, till the war lays down its loads. So it shall be; and if Allah had willed, He would have avenged Himself upon them; but that He may try some of you by means of others. And those who are slain in the way of Allah, He will not send their works astray.

Yikes. Someone’s not being honest with himself. What you talkin’ ’bout, Abdullah?

When the king continues saying, “We all want better future for our children and their children. For them to feel isolated, that’s the danger,” one has to ask what the isolation is from. The truth? The reality of what is and what is not?

What you talkin’ ’bout, Abdullah? Peace is a wonderful goal. But the truth will set us free, not passing on falsehoods to future generations because, well, we’re too afraid to face the reality that what we’ve been raised with, grown accustomed to, or just prefer so as not to rock the boat. That’s not what the Messiah preached.

Just sayin’.

"Oh look! Twins!"

“Oh look! Twins!”

The rise and fall of fur-babies

You’ve heard the story: Replacement baby syndrome. That’s adults treating dogs, cats, even inanimate objects like they are a living child. What a practical way to satisfy that craving while never having to take real time with life’s demands – like the urge to procreate and nurture the real product. Right?

The Federalist reports, “Millennials, it turns out, are twice as likely as baby boomers to buy clothing for their pets, an industry which, along with other forms of ‘pet-pampering,’ amounted to $11 billion last year, and markets such essential items as pet strollers and pet slings.”

And yet one cannot help but feel for those boomers whose children are providing them with a bumper crop of nothing to enjoy, unless one finds it humorous to be considered grandparent to a dog or cat. Imagine sharing those photos with friends. (Not.)

But even though Millennials are often seen toting their Pekinese in baby slings or strolling the mall with their Bichon poodle inside a tricked-out pram, there still comes a time when priorities shift. Or what’s popular shifts (let’s be honest). And what happens then?

Take a look at the poor little dog below attempting to engage with the new star attraction in the house:

The little guy should get an “A” for effort, but whoever videotaped this piece might be considered cruel. Put the dog up on the bed, folks. Good grief.

Just watching that clip is enough to exhaust anyone.

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